Common Sense Just Isn’t So Common

I have now been living independently (insert Beyonce lyric) now for 7 weeks. Don’t’ worry for those who hate math, I’ll do it for you!  That’s nearly 2 whole months. (“I have a 36 month year old”… “Crazy lady, don’t make me do math…why can’t you just say he is three?)  I’ve learned a whole lot since I’ve been living in micro-city Boothbay Maine. But before I go into deep thought about things I’ve learned about who I truly am, and the great education opportunities Bigelow has provided me(read previous post), oh no no no sweetheart I’m talking about other people. I’m learning so much about the crap people didn’t, probably still don’t know. Through my young adult life I’ve had some very fantastic people pop up and teach me little tid-bits about how to navigate through this crazy so-called-life. Special thanks to my grandparents, my boss, teacher, and more importantly my loving and so patient parents for putting up with anyone under the age of 22. They’re nuts, still boggles my mind you survived the teenage years… don’t know how you did it (shutter). While I won’t include all advice my parents have bestowed upon me (“NO LOVE WITHOUT THE GLOVE SWEETY”- Dad), I will tell you somethings I have learned that maybe at some point in your youthful life, someone somewhere should of mentioned/taught you/slapped you upside the head with…SOMETHING to make you pay attention and put it in that cranium of yours.

I thought I would take this time to edumucate those young readers (also maybe a little ranting…just a bit) .  Some of this list comes from my lovely roommates (sorry if you are reading this, but you have brought this upon yourself).

INTRODUCING……………..

Crap someone should have taught you at some point in your young life

1.       How to wash a dish without using a dishwasher…. I quickly realized after going through AN ENTIRE bottle of dishwashing soap within the first week of living here, not everyone knew that you don’t need a tablespoon of soap to clean ONE fork. I became the keeper of soap and had to dilute it 10 fold so we weren’t going through soap like my older brother goes through a pack of Mountain Dew. Tip: If you fill the sink with hot water with a good squirt of soap, you can usually do the entire amount of dishes from dinner. Washing them one by one waste water and kills my soul a little each time. 

2.       Don’t use metal on non-stick pans….RIP to those fallen pans and hello to my increase of cancer. If it’s black, don’t be wack and use some wood to flip your eggs. 

3.       Tolerate others because others tolerate you….. People will get on your nerves. Like to the point where everything they do just irritates the living crap out of you. If I ever get the urge to punch my roommate in the throat because of the way he is chewing his otter pop, I remove myself from the situation and go into my room because I know there are probably things I do that irritate the living crap out of him. I would want him to tolerate me so I tolerate him.

4.       What’s yours is yours, what is mine is not yours…… If you mind your own stuff people will often leave yours alone. 

5.       Choose your battles ….. This one comes from years and years of training at my little home sandwich shop. If you complain about every little thing, when you have an actual concern people won’t listen because you have become the complainer of the house. You have a right to complain if it’s a real reason to complain, other than that bite your tongue and pray to get you through the urge. 

6.       How to jump start a car……. My daddy didn’t raise no fool. I’ve now have jump started 2 cars. One car more than four times. The car that is jumping: red to red, black to black. The car that is being jump (the one that is dead): Red to red, black to ground (metal). By the way the plastic car frame does not count as metal. 

7.       How to make grilled cheese…….. this one just made me sad. 

8.       If someone tells you to correct the way you are doing something, it’s for a reason……. The people you are working for have been doing there job for a very long time. Usually they won’t tell you to correct something if needed, but if they do tell you something, for example, please do not put needles in the garbage bag because they go in the sharps container, it’s usually for a reason.. like so the other intern (insert my name here) doesn’t have to put their hand into the garbage for the fourth time to remove those needles praying I…I mean “they” don’t stab themselves? 

9.       Banana peels,  no matter the argument,  don’t go into the recycling bin….  If the garbage is full, just take it out. Don’t put your nasty rotting banana peel wherever you may damn please. So some other poor intern doesn’t have to reach her hand into the recycling bag and pull it out. 

10.   Say what you mean, but don’t be mean…… there are a lot of words to describe how you feel. But maybe saying “hey dumbass…” isn’t the best way to approach it. I learned this one from my dad when I was dating someone who I no longer wanted to date. I could say what I wanted to say without using specific events against him. I didn’t have to be mean to him to get my point across. Oh trust me, I could use a whole lot of colorful language, but it wouldn’t of gotten my point across. It didn’t do me any good to be mean. Just tell them how you feel. There is no need to point out other peoples insecurities because they are probably well aware of them.

Well there it is folks. I could make a list going on and on but SEE number 5. There is some of my advice on how to survive living with 10 other people. I thought I would make a quick update about my research. It worked! I got what I needed to get into the parasite and it is expressing it! What a sigh of relieve! Along with pictures I thought I would add some quotes my mentor has said. He accent is very thick, but he is very funny.

"Holy Cow"- Emma       "No we say Holy Lobster, you're in Maine Emma"

"Look at these b#$tches....OH no I meant BEAST!"